Friday, December 12, 2014
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Been very emotional this past week.
I hope that writing this out will slow the tears down. I keep breaking down here at work...with death on my mind.
The past deaths and the up and coming deaths.
I'm not even afraid of death. I just know what death does to my emotions. I must get a handle on these.
I miss my grandma. I miss my uncle. I miss my grandpa.
I miss my grandparents on my mothers side too. I miss people whom I diddnt get the chance to meet. Observation shows that I've had more family deaths then the rest of these guys at work but this is no competition in the least bit.
I have endured plenty this past 10 years.
I'm staying away from alcohol long as I feel like this. Shit just makes you more depressed. Had some beer last night and realized that real quick.
Wish Beanz and Whikkid would respond to my texts. Hope they ain't mad at me
Monday, November 24, 2014
I'm writing for Essdi this time around, you might know him as Thurge. The idea stems around him sending beats to an artist friend in Hawaii to sketch to.
Essdi hit me wanting to know if I could place vocals on top of the productions.
Very quietly I'm doing that.
Besides soundcloud though honestly, have I ever kept my work on front street?
Monday, November 17, 2014
Morning, it's Monday and I have lots to say. I ended up having to go to couples counseling over the weekend, ladies request...lets just say that hurdle has been crossed. Hopefully if I ever have to go back there, it's to tell them that I'm fine without the help. Doesn't mean that the people weren't very nice, they actually were just fine. I have no ill feelings for them. Appreciate the work.
Next. I recorded something which is a pretty major deal. Music has been turned off...the music making part at least. I'm stopping myself before I get complacent and am no longer amused from my play on words. Instrumentals get a lot of play from me lately. There's so much heat on soundcloud that I firmly believe now that there isn't "a best" artist walking around out there. We all have techniques and styles which we take turns manifesting and handing off to one another. The song I recorded is a hello wave to tepalom since I'm concerned for him. His music is fluid and very organically put together. I almost always sound great over his productions. This latest one didn't disappoint.
The ride in this morning was in the 20's. My fingers are numb as fuck. The gloves work, just not for this extreme of tempuratures. Need to either double up next time or upgrade the gear. I'm still riding my bike around despite everyone's personal opinions of safety and other blah blah I don't want to hear. Sometimes I feel like there is just too many life commentators out there. Directing every life play for you. It's not needed. Least for me.
I'd be lying if I said that I diddnt miss making paintings and making music. Somedays I walk around I just don't feel like I'm totally fulfilled. Always feeling like there's still something to do for the day. I feel bad because I just turned my back on the arts. Gave it a cold shoulder and expect it to greet me back with open arms soon as I get back to my normal self.
Let's hope the arts don't have a fuck you attitude when I get back to it.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
The women has a real cancerous way of thinking. She seems to know the future and will make present decisions to prevent the definite.
The women has faith, though not in I.
It's also apparent that if I diddnt have various outlets that I would indeed need some form of counseling. This comes form my own observations. As a unit, I can be strong. Individually I'm strong already. These kinda skills keep me confident. There's really no other way to put it. I don't "see" like I used to. Which is a good thing.
Least I now know how cynical women are as well. I always knew how far men could mentally take things but girls have the game sewed up.
Now, as for music......
Influential Minds (crew) and technically their first album left me with sensations and feelings of proud. It's been a very long time coming but they proved that extra time can help achieve quality.
The sound is listenable. The voices are different enough to remain unique amongst each other, and the beats are safe and feel good. I imagine it will retain its appeal around the city. It's polished....good footprint to leave for the city yall.
I played the walking trip stuff this morning. Brought tears to my eyes. Then I stopped instantly.
A walking trip really has staying power as well. Yall slept like no other on that walking trip page. Damn.
Monday, November 10, 2014
Your beats gonna get done in. You don't even know imma use it either. But that's my thing.
One day it'll surface somewhere and it'll be a grand surprise. You'll stand back and think "fucker took my beat, and did an awful lot of justice to it."
That's what I do.
In other news, it's scorpion season. Birthday times for nearly my entire family. Best wishes to you scorpions.